I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
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