Little spoons don't ask big questions
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
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