Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
did all my christmas shopping this morning at 4am drunk. never went to sleep. i was walking home drunk last night when i passed a target and saw 3 kids having a dance off. had to join. somehow they convinced me to go shoopping with them. i bought 4 disco balls and a lava lamp.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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