Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
Just had an old man tip me two dollars and say "here put this in your baby fund, you'll have a baby someday" I swear this is gods way of saying GET ON BIRTH CONTROL NOW!
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
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