I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Randomize