Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
Randomize