we're blogging at a bar
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
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