Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
so i texed my mom when i was trashed last night and said "i know its 3 am, just go to bed and i'll be back by the time we leave for the airport"
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
I fell asleep in my underwear on the deck. What the fuck.
This was the best text I've ever woken up to
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
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