Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
True strength comes from lack of pants
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
Randomize
