these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
Randomize
