i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
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