I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
Randomize
