it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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