You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
She told me I should be a condom model.
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Randomize
