What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize
