They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
