I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
only if we run a train.
done.
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
I stole all of the toasting champagne and did an interpretive dance to "wind beneath my wings". I am literally everything you're not supposed to do at weddings.
But your showmanship is impeccable.
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
Randomize
