Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
Randomize
