Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
Randomize
