I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
My 12 y/o god son's bandmate just asked me to their school dance. Still he's a better catch than the last one...
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
Randomize
