I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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