hotel room ftw
Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
Randomize
