Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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