love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
I got inside last night via doggy door
We were drunk waiting for tacos and I gave him a handy in the back of the Uber while giving the driver relationship advice. I think I'm handling the whole grad school thing alright.
Randomize
