just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
I woke up to three texts telling me to "go fuck myself," a panicked voicemail from my mom, and a girl thanking me... I'm not sure which I should take care of first
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Randomize
