so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
Randomize
