They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
My dick has a subreddit
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
Randomize