You're completely useless in the revolution.
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
Randomize
