Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
The idiot babysitter thought my dildo was a teething toy and gave it to our child.
Did you put it in the freezer again?
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
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