You don't have asthma, your pregnant
he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
So I have $4.22 in my bank account, just wrote a check for a tooth brush from quikmart, and bought a 25 cent condom from the bathroom. i don't know whats more sad, my bank account or the fact that i'm entrusting my entire future to a condom machine that was probably last filled in 1970
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
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