i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
Randomize
