so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize
