and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
