My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
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