I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
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