Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
In America we eat man semen.
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
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