Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
Randomize
