Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
