I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
I'm determined to sit on that face.
Randomize
