i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
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