You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
Randomize