I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
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