is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
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