so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
