her voice is like 435,765 daggers being simultaneously twisted into my eardrum
i'd rather just be hit by a car than answer her phone calls
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
lets start a swedish sibling band together
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize
