Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
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