I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
I have tasted many bathrooms
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
Randomize
