so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
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