Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
Last night i walked into a gas station to get condoms. I threw them on the counter and the guy gave me a funny look because i was wearing a bra under an open cardigan and no shoes. I screamed "DONT JUDGE ME!" and he gave them to me for free.
Randomize
