I'm really into asian looking animals
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
Randomize
