Words i added to my t9 today: gnomes, facebook, and chlamydia.
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
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